Australia vs Canada

Sup my hombres! So i know many of you are dying to know, just how does canada compare to the great land of Oz...so here is my attempt to do just that:

I suppose the most important question here is how does one compare two countries in the first place? A wise person may use factors such as socio-economic status, level of employment, or political structure, while over-simplifying economists may look at the latest figures for GDP. But really, none of you want to hear about that as much as i could be bothered writing about it, so here are some different criteria...

1) Sport

I think i've almost said enough on this topic after i tell you that instead of having a 'Sport' section in the Calgary Herald, they have an 'Ice Hockey' section, and that their supposed sport stores contain no more than the equipment and accessories required for playing hockey and going skiing/snowboarding. It is most certainly true that during the winter season sporting activities in Canada become quite restrictive, especially in a place like Banff. Year-round sports in Australia such as golf and tennis are solely summer sports, while water activities such as skiing and recreational boating are difficult to pursue on frozen lakes and rivers. On top of all this, Australia is home to the greatest sport of all, Football, and has a national soccer team that would kick Canada's arse...

Australia 1 Canada 0

2) Beer

The social lubricant, a most integral topic. Almost all countries brew some magnificent beer, Australia the Crown Lager, Canada the Alexander Kieth's IPA, so in order to compare i will have to focus primarily on how it is served. For example, if you order a beer at the local pub in Melbourne, you will most likely recieve a 'pot' glass, no more than a few sips really. However i am yet to see such a small portion of beer served in Canada, you will almost automatically be served a pint, quite the perfect size. Another positive for Canada is the 12-pack carton, something i cannot recall coming across too often at the Dan Murphy's in Alphington. Not so large that you cannot take it on the bus home with you, and not so small that you find yourself back at the liquor store the next day...

Australia 1 Canada 1

3) Wildlife

some may question the relevance of this topic, since the argument of what animal is better than another is purely subjective. Therefore, the only reasonable means of coming to a conclusion is to hypothisize some sort of scenario where native animals from each land are put together in a room and compete in some sort of all-in fight to the death. While neither country contains any type of lion-eating hell beasts, I have to say that Kangaroos, Emu's and Koala's would have difficulty holding their ground against cougars, bears and mooses.

Australia 1 Canada 2

4) Food

With the wonders of international trade at work the products you find on the shelves at the local safeway (yes, they have safeway here) are practically identical. At least until you take a closer look for some subtle differences. One thing that caught my eye is the absence of lamb in Canada (what i wouldn't do for some tender juicy crumbed lamb cutlets right now). And the bacon here can be summed up with one word - rubbish, with a noticeable lack of any thing i would call 'meat'. I also sense a severe shortage of fresh seafood, and i dont think your traditional Fish 'n' Chip shop exists here. On the plus side i like the fact that you dont have to worry about your ice cream melting on the walk home from the supermarket.

Australia 2 Canada 2

So at the moment the scores are tied, but I'm going to settle the debate on the grounds of a few annoying facts regarding Canada:

- The existence of the penny, a completely useless form of currency. If a penny fell from the sky and straight into somebody's palm, they would throw it on the ground since it is not worth the effort it would take to reach into your back pocket and get your wallet out.

-The 'tipping culture' and pricing system. Not only are you expected to tip someone for merely pouring you a beer, but the majority of prices you see around do not include tax. People should not have to need to calculate 7% tax in their head to determine exactly what they are paying for their deli sandwich.

- It's proximity to the USA, and the Frenchies.

In regards to the videos, we had trouble uploading to Youtube so you guys will have to see them on our return (thanks mum for sending the CD-rom though!)

See you all soon

Aussie Aussie Aussie...

Golden